not something I imagined while drinking an adult beverage.
Image by Salvatore Vuono via freedigitalphoto.net
For much of my life I have, perhaps naively, believed
that movies can fulfill some of my contemplative need.
The plots always seem puffed with bits of fantasy
which emphasize the lesson that we're supposed to see.
I watch stories I like over, and over, and over again.
I turn them on "as background noise" now and then.
I've figured that others existed who learn things this way.
Didn't know they'd become superheroes until the other day.
To the Real Life Superheroes who may feel I'm mocking...
sorry, but I find your devotion to world safety a bit shocking.
You aren't made of steel and can't run at the speed of light,
yet you roam the streets to save us from danger in the night.
Hopefully you'll never face the likes of Lex Luthor or Dr. Doom,
or any scary big dude who could throw you across the room.
Your "uniforms" may immediately irk certain tough guy types,
though if you help land 'em in jail it'll be the least of their gripes.
I'm guessing you consider the X-Men and Spiderman to be "must see".
I'm more likely to watch the Incredibles, Kick Ass or Despicable Me.
The way I see it, this superhero stuff is a bit much for a mere mortal.
On first read of your existence, from my lips sprang a weird chortle.
Could it be that Kick Ass inspired some to try to make a difference?
The news of Phoenix Jones feels like a movie in real life occurrence.
Next will we hear of Big Daddy, Hit Girl and Red Mist imitators?
I'm pretty sure that was not the intention of the movie's creators.
While this rhyme may bring a smirk, I think this is quite serious.
To hit the streets, masked, to fight crime seems scarily delirious.
Eventually, don't you think you'll become the wanted one?
Does bravery mean knowing that you'll face a loaded gun?
You certainly better be sure to keep your true identity secret.
If someone offers you a cash tip, you should most certainly keep it.
You may have training but I know you can't climb walls or fly.
Someday you too may cross the exact wrong tough guy.
So keep in mind that Kick Ass visited the hospital frequently.
Don't forget Mr. Incredible was sued and punished legally.
Perhaps, instead, emulate characters like my girl Greenzilla.
Her identity is up for grabs to a green cause hero, non-guerrilla.
All I ask is that I have full rights to Greenzilla's adventure stories.
OK, fine... the real superhero and I will share the monetary glories.
But be careful when feeding cows garlic or planting an unplanned tree,
I wouldn't want you to compromise yourself or your freedom for me.
© Rachel Hoyt 2011
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